Not being able to breathe is one of my great fears. As an asthmatic
I have had the experience of not being able to draw enough air into my lungs no
matter how hard I try. I have been rushed to the hospital in an ambulance due
to a case of bronchitis that overwhelmed my body and lung’s ability to keep up.
It should be no surprise that Covid19 has had me more than bit freaked out. My
body and mind have been on high alert.
Saturday morning I began actively trying to calm my mind and
my body down. I’ve been deep breathing, meditating, dancing, and moving. I’m
checking in with my body regularly. I have relegated my news times to twice a
day – early in the morning and just about lunch time just after the Maine CDC
does their daily briefing. I’m writing in my journal as much as I remember
to. And of course, there are these blog
posts.
Yesterday, after five days of this work, felt like the first
day that I could think clearly in nearly two weeks. My brain finally felt like
it had room for something other than simmering anxiety and worry. I was able to begin working through the
backlog of tasks that had piled up while my brain was preoccupied.
The worry and fear are still there, but they are not overwhelming.
Right now, I am okay.
I don’t know the future, but right now, I am okay.
I can’t predict that even with all the measures we are
taking here that I won’t get sick, but right now, I am okay.
I may very well have a panic attack tomorrow, but right now
I am okay.
Right now is the only thing I can measure.
Right now is the only moment I have.
Right now, I am okay.
---
Be well.
Take care of yourself.
Take care of one another.
Stay home as much as possible.
Be kind.
Let those you love know how you feel.
And of course, please wash your hands.
Take care of yourself.
Take care of one another.
Stay home as much as possible.
Be kind.
Let those you love know how you feel.
And of course, please wash your hands.
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